ASSURANCE x FEAR OF GOD

It's almost Friday! (: Been a tad busier at work after getting back from the camp.
My daily rambles and what's not usually goes to my Dayre, while the more substantial stuffs are blogged here haha.

I meant to share more about the Gzone retreat.
Haha. Basically we had great fun, hahaha.
Team building games (the inner competitive spirits surfaced hahahahahaha), eat alot, cup noodles supper (imagine a few girls under one roof hahahahaha), eat more, massage and eat some more. HAHAHA. 

The 2nd night when Garrett shared left me really really touched by God's love in my life.
Here's to share a snippet of what I wrote in my notebook (:

"Finding joy to do the things of God, and guarding my heart in the deep foundations that anchored me right from the very beginning of my walk. Gotta make pre-made decisions in life so that when I am caught in tough situations, I know what my choices can be. God's love covers all weaknesses, but we should never take that for granted and let the fear of God also guard my heart. Having the fear of God is also really important because you will then begin to really walk circumspectly.
Be in the world, and not of the world. Let not the self desire/ things of the world will not start taking over my heart. God, let Your will be above all else and that I will walk into my destiny- I know You will guide me and take me into your intent for me. Every struggles, decisions, choices that I make, give me wisdom to think of Your love and have the fear of God. God is the God of ALL. He knows everyone of our hearts (v.Matthew 22:32)"

-

It really apt for this season- things are starting to unfold (:
We had an amazing CG session yesterday!
Had a really good time just spending time in the Spirit.
Prayer x Worship.
I was initially praying for myself- work, things on my mind etc...
& as I prayed, I just felt really assured that I need not worry, but when I begin to put Him first, and others first, things will all work out.
So I started praying for my church, pastors, leaders, my family's salvation, my friends... and I felt happy (: Happy that I prayed for them. Happy to know that all will be well because God knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows all situations (:

DESTINY x DEFINING x DECISIONS

So its been a few weeks since I went for the Gzone Retreat in Johor Bahru (: It was a 3 days 2 nights thing and we bunked at Tanjung Puteri Resort. Well, the space was big and all. Haha, but not the cleanest >.<
Nonetheless, it was a good time just spending quality moments with my favourite people, and of cos' Fig Tree moments & the precious Me-God ignited times.
Felt very much like how days of my youth camps were like (feeling old saying this even) Ha-ha!
But that spiritual intimacy was really encouraging and uplifting.

(PART 1) - Gzone Retreat! (:

Here's to Day 1 before setting off:

So glad Xiaohui could join us (:
We headed to grab quick lunch and headed down to the resort to check in and all.
Looks not bad actually right.

Broke into our groups- I was in Team Yogi. HAHAHA.
Becos' our team leader, Kaisen (was nicknamed Yogi :p)

Then we headed off for seafood dinner (Todak Restuarant)! nommmms.
I wasn't super satisfied with the dinner (maybe cos' it was abit cold already)
But okay, it was fine.
Haha. The place was filled with many many Singaporeans!

After dinner we headed back to the resort and Garrett shared with us.
Just amazed by Garrett because he was preaching for Service 1 that Saturday, and it was Sunday night when he was sharing/preaching to us and then praying for the couples.
Throughout the whole day since morning, he was spending time with the zone as well!

Garrett shared with us about (( Destiny x Defining x Decisions ))
Really awaken something inside of me.
So many times we struggle and do things based on our own understanding and more of what we want instead of what God really plans for us.

However, to put it simply, God has a calling for each and everyone of us. We may not understand and we may not see it now, but we will eventually.

And for alot of us in that room that night, I believe and really think we are in the best years and phase of our life to step into what God has intended. 

I mean we are all different and really unique, there are different ways He is going to use us. 

Just few weeks prior to hearing this, I was just sharing with Gewwy about how my heart feels a little anxious and I was wondering about my future, in terms of what I should be doing more for God, in church and even my career.

But that night God spoke, and shared that if He brings me some where, He will definitely be with me.

God is going to give me what is needed & His grace is sufficient for me.

& to DEFINE,  how would I describe my life in one line... that got me thinking.

If God were to describe your life in one line, what would it be? 

& the DECISIONS we make day to day.

Something Garrett shared that stirred my spirit that night-

"you are the accumulation of the decisions we make."

Indeed there's power in decisions/choices we make in our life, only we can make these decisions/choices.

The steps that we take will lead us to our destination but 

the decisions that you make bring you to your destiny

the days that we live too, will bring us to our destiny

(Ephesians 5:15-17 NKJV)

See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

circumspectly: be very careful to how we walk our steps (make choices/decisions)

So that got me thinking about my life as it is, what are the wrong/bad decisions I have made?

I know I have taken wrong steps,
I mentioned previously, but I know I have walked on from it & walking right.

That night it was a reminder, 
we really really need to love God and have the fear of God in our lives.

It was good, managed to HTHT with Xiaohui too and chilled abit with the girls in the same villa that night (:

More on Part 2's thoughts in next postttt!

WHAT IS YOUR STORY TO TELL?

Friday self-reflection mode on this morning. Haha.Oh happy Friday by the way! (long weekend ahead!) yay.

What is your story to tell?

There are many different stories we hear in our life. We hear stories from the media about the latest happenings around us. We also hear stories from parents/grandparents about their past and younger days. Of course there are also stories about gossips of people around us, from friends and colleagues.

Many stories we hear in our lives, we have forgotten. 
But some always stay in our hearts. 

The woman who gave up her alabaster flask. 
Something that is precious to her for God... that costly fragrant oil. 
Everyone thought it was a crazy thing to do, but God was touched by her action. 
(Matthew 26:6-13)

It is said in v13 that, “wherever this gospel is preached in the whole world, what this woman has done will also be told as a memorial to her.”
God wants our stories to be heard.

So while I was in that reflecting zone, I was wondering-
If my life is a movie/story, is it exciting? 
Do I have a story worth watching/ telling? Or is there anything to be told?
Maybe it is a good story, maybe it's exciting. But does it enrich? Or is it just entertaining?
If it is just entertaining, it might be forgotten over time.

The woman with the alabaster flask story is of eternal.
What she has done is- His story. 

What is yours?

Let my lifesong sing to You.

SLOWLY BUT SURELY

Always remembering that session we sat there watching the movie "Lions for Lamb". 
It's been a few years back since that session, I can't even remember when to be honest. But the take away from that session remains so so precious.
This is... growing up. Sometimes it feels like everything is coming at you. All the decisions we have to worry and think about sometimes. So many choices, decisions to make on our own. These are things perhaps we hate about growing up. 
But yet again, seeing it in another perspective makes me really comforted. It is a good thing with this 'challenge'. It means that I am... indeed growing up. It means to take responsibility over my life, choices and decisions. This means, me stepping into God's plans for me.

I will always remember that my Pastors +Tan Seow How & Pastor Cecilia Chan have taught me to make pre-made decisions in my life. That way, when we are at our lowest, our pre-made decisions based on our convictions allow us to make better choices. 

I can't say that I have made the best decisions in life. 
I don't, and I know it. I try to, and I'm still trying daily. We all do, isn't it? 

In fact,  I made a really bad decision just as I stepped into the workforce after almost a year.
For almost 1.5years, I drifted away from God.
I gave myself many excuses to the decisions I made during this period of time. 
My insecurities and emotions got me making wrong choices most of the time. Many days I would feel too tired emotionally to do anything and rather 'nua'. 
I knew He was there all along, I know I still love Him... but I was hesitant and often made decisions in my own strength.

Cut the long story short, I am glad God eventually picked me up and shook me out of that emotional wreck I was.

I remember Garrett once told me that it is important we take responsibilities about the decisions and choices we make in our lives. We all have to learn. If we make the wrong choice, we accept it and we grow from it. 
Nothing is ever wasted.

I learned the hard way lah, oh sigh.

But that's fine, slowly but surely. 

JOURNEY FOR A DECADE

Almost half a year into 2015. May is coming to an end and I am pretty hyped up for June.
2015 marks many significant moments. For one, its been a decade of my salvation.

Looking back, I am glad Heart of God Church is the place I found God.
It's been quite a journey I have to say. I have had my fair share of ups and downs. Come to realise that things that used to matter doesn't anymore. Many people have come and left. There are also times I wanted to give up but held on nonetheless.
But one thing I am certain of is that God's promises are true and that His love is constant throughout this 10 years.

I chanced upon my little old blog just recently (my writings as a 16 year old convent girl).
A little embarrassed I am (who am I kidding, actually very)
Haha. But this little entry made me smile amidst me cringing at every other entries:

I remember a week before 10 April 2005, I headed for a concert in this brown maroon building located at Clemenceau Ave, Dhoby Ghaut. My favourite handsome cousin Ivan invited me! (of cos' I would agree) & I was touched and moved by the presence of God that very day. 

I did struggle with many frivolous matters that are precious to a 16 year old teenager girl. It was hard to let go of what was precious and commit. But I'm glad I met people nice people like Pamela and Esther on the day of the concert. They made it easier for me to step out of my comfort zone and take a step of faith to attend my first service on 10 April, 10 years back.

I was taking my O levels that year. And I remember that I was hurt by some boy that I was interested in at that time. But above these, reading this post makes me remember that my heart was joyful that very day I went for my first service. Everything else were not major because of the decision to let God enter.

It's been 10 years now and I am a working adult.
Let's be honest about it, of course a Christian's walk ain't a bed of roses.
I am only human, very ordinary.
I do struggle with work woes like anyone else and whatsoever, but I now have God's assurances that I hold on to.

One thing that doesn't change- that joyful heart knowing my heart stays true to God's love.
Thankful tonight to know I have made the right decisions in my life, that is to fight on. I held on to His promises and I am still be found in this Home.